and we voluntarily bought it
« previous entry | next entry »
Sep. 16th, 2007 | 03:50 pm
posted by: 70schild in my_ugly_crap
Our anonymous model shows off, for starters, the sheer magnitude of the lack of sizing. Is it meant to hang like that? Reminiscent of the Flashdance cropped sweatshirt and sweaty welder-turned-dancer, it actually fails miserably making the viewer wish a welding torch would appear to relieve our eyes. Not seen in the picture above, the drape is such that it actually pulls up a bit, leaving a huge gap at your back. Presumably to show off one’s tramp stamp. This is highlighted as well by the self-proclaimed title of “Bad Girl“.
And we haven’t even talked about the color yet. When was the last time you wore green and yellow together, on purpose, and were not at a sporting event? It’s a case of too many twirls at the center of the roller rink, with the kid who’s trying just too hard to be cool. What a feeling, indeed.
The nasty seam finishing (such as it is) the haphazard cropping, the polyester of the fabric, the colors, the lack of fit, yet the mysterious ability to make any wearer (however thin) look as if they’ve gained twenty pounds across their midsection all serve to render the viewer wishing they’d never heard of the eighties in the first place, let alone long for a style comeback.
And I’m thinking this may be a garment not manufactured recently, for the retro crowd, but one that was actually present in the eighties. Much like myself. Now, I don’t know about you young'uns today, but my memory of fashions back then were surrounded by glitter and pastels. Leg warmers, roller skates with rainbow laces and satin baseball jackets, dolphin shorts and glitter transfer tees. Those were the DAYS, my friends.
I wish I had my camera today, because I just thought of more of my ugly crap... er, I mean family heirlooms... that you will be awed by. Plus I have work to avoid, so that's a bonus.
Note the bonus Saucy_Dwellings decor in the background highlighting Early Renovations.